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Archive for the ‘feedback’ Category
Monday, December 19th, 2011
Each of us has a bucket located in our heart and whenever we receive any type of feedback it goes in our bucket. I’ve taught the metaphor of the feedback bucket to thousands of people around the country. Perhaps because it’s so simple, or because of the catchy name, but for whatever reason, it helps people grasp the importance of the feedback with give and receive in our interactions with others. Picture your feedback bucket and imagine all types of feedback you receive each day going into your bucket. The problem is that we have holes in our buckets, which cause the feedback to leak out over time. If there are a lot of holes, or if some are large, the feedback leaks out quickly. If a person’s bucket doesn’t have many holes, or if they are just pinpricks, the feedback leaks out slowly. Remember, we all have a bucket and every bucket has some holes in it.
Who put the holes in your bucket? The answer is complex, but stated simply they came from both internal and external sources. You probably drilled a few yourself through careless actions and others came from parents, family, friends, associates, and your present and former bosses. Because our lives constantly change, the holes in our feedback buckets are in a state of flux. Holes come, and holes go, but some are always there.
How does an employee behave when his or her feedback bucket is empty? How would that same employee behave if his or her bucket had a few deposits of feedback? The response I get to these questions from retail managers is surprisingly consistent. And I’ll bet you probably know some of the answers. But before we get to that, first keep in mind that people suffer great pain when their bucket is empty. Feedback deprivation is one of the most psychologically painful experiences a person can have. In fact, mentally healthy people will go to extraordinary measures to ensure that their bucket doesn’t run dry.
Consider that people don’t consciously know when their bucket is empty. It’s something we can’t recognize because most of us don’t understand it. It is a feeling or an emotion; and being able to pinpoint emotions is difficult for most people.
Even if a person knew that his or her “bucket gauge” was on empty, it’s highly unlikely that the person would ask for feedback from others–especially men, because it would show weakness. If women are the better communicators, like some people say, and if they are more intuitive, again like some experts say, then maybe women would be better suited to know when their bucket was empty, and maybe they might be more able to ask for help.
So how can you know if one of your employee’s feedback bucket is running low? Typically, a problem with inadequate feedback will show up in one or more of six ways.
1. A person’s work performance (quantity and quality of work) is quite often directly related to the amount of feedback in his or her bucket. It doesn’t mean that a person will stop working when their bucket’s empty, but sustained performance over time requires at least some feedback in the bucket. So if you see an employee’s performance beginning to erode try stepping up your feedback to that person.
2. The ability to get along peaceably with co¬workers and even work effectively as a team is also directly related to how much feedback those people recently received. Workers are less likely to demonstrate patience, cooperation, understanding or tolerance when their feedback buckets are empty, or even near empty. So when you want a group of employees to become a team of employees, be sure that your feedback to them is frequent and positive.
3. Employees with empty buckets are prone to be followers, rather than take the initiative to be leaders. Followers wait for things to happen, while leaders take the initiative and make things happen. That’s because followers don’t feel as though it’s their job. Decision–making is an integral part of demonstrating initiative. Why make the effort to take a risk and make a decision if it’s not your job in the first place? So if you see employees lacking in initiative, step up your feedback.
4. People suffering from feedback deprivation commonly engage in destructive communication and people whose buckets are fairly full frequently engage in constructive communication. The simple cause of complaining, griping and back-biting, especially in the break room, may be nothing more than a number of employees who have been ignored too long and their buckets are running on empty. So when you become aware of destructive communication, step up your feedback.
5. Each day most of us make a decision to either get up and go to work, or roll over and go back to sleep. Part of that decision is centered on how much feedback we have received recently. A fair portion of time and attendance issues, such as being late or absent, could he prevented if managers invested more time in giving appropriate feedback to employees.
6. A few years ago a group of Outback restaurants implemented a program to reduce turnover among part¬-time employees. Each member of management was required to do three things each day to every part-time employee. They were to look the employee in the eye, use his or her first name, and ask a question about how their day was going. So to a part-time employee who was a student and worked the evening shift the comment might be, “Ann, how was your day at school?” Sounds simple, doesn’t it? But within six months Outback had slashed part-time employee turnover in those restaurants by a whopping 50 percent! How important is feedback? Ask those employees.
So what can you do as a manager to make deposits in employees’ buckets and to even plug up a few holes? There are four easy, but important strategies you might consider.
1. The quantity of feedback you give someone is important, but the quality is even more important. An idle comment may be welcome, but a question about how your midterm exam went yesterday could be a huge deposit. How much do you really know about your employees? Do you know how they spend their spare time? Do you know their hobbies? Are you concerned about them as an important part of your team? Take a few minutes and find out. And then fill a bucket!
2. Employees who receive appropriate and timely praise and recognition for their contributions to the company feel better about themselves. Feelings of being valuable and a contributor to the company can plug a few holes. Many books have been written about how to recognize employees, but the regrettable truth is that few managers consistently use the principle of praise and recognition appropriately. Look for both individual and group achievement and then make a fuss, and do it where a number of people can hear.
3. The third tactic to plug holes and make feedback deposits is to celebrate achievements. Too often managers believe that results are to be expected. It’s why we give you a paycheck, so we don’t need to celebrate individual successes. However, if you don’t pay attention to individual and group achievements, you’ll never know who crosses the finish line. Work at knowing who is achieving and then celebrate those achievements with your employees.
4. The extent to which any employee embraces changes to operating procedures or organizational structure is directly related to how much feedback that employee has been given regarding why the changes are necessary. Remember, feedback is a two way street. It doesn’t just flow from the manager to the employee. It needs to flow from the employee to the manager too. When employees are asked for their feedback regarding potential changes, they are much more likely to embrace the change after it is implemented. Ensure that feedback flows in both directions.
In this article we’ve looked at the feedback bucket. I like the metaphor because its uniqueness is so memorable to my students. Take a serious look at your employees this month and determine which buckets are running too low. Then, make some major deposits in those buckets. Use the techniques in this article. You’ll like the results. Look for a
 Each of us has a bucket located in our heart and whenever we receive any type of feedback it goes in our bucket. I’ve taught the metaphor of the feedback bucket to thousands of people around the country. Perhaps because it’s so simple, or because of the catchy name, but for whatever reason, it helps people grasp the importance of the feedback with give and receive in our interactions with others. Picture your feedback bucket and imagine all types of feedback you receive each day going into your bucket. The problem is that we have holes in our buckets, which cause the feedback to leak out over time. If there are a lot of holes, or if some are large, the feedback leaks out quickly. If a person’s bucket doesn’t have many holes, or if they are just pinpricks, the feedback leaks out slowly. Remember, we all have a bucket and every bucket has some holes in it.
Who put the holes in your bucket? The answer is complex, but stated simply they came from both internal and external sources. You probably drilled a few yourself through careless actions and others came from parents, family, friends, associates, and your present and former bosses. Because our lives constantly change, the holes in our feedback buckets are in a state of flux. Holes come, and holes go, but some are always there.
How does an employee behave when his or her feedback bucket is empty? How would that same employee behave if his or her bucket had a few deposits of feedback? The response I get to these questions from retail managers is surprisingly consistent. And I’ll bet you probably know some of the answers. But before we get to that, first keep in mind that people suffer great pain when their bucket is empty. Feedback deprivation is one of the most psychologically painful experiences a person can have. In fact, mentally healthy people will go to extraordinary measures to ensure that their bucket doesn’t run dry.
Consider that people don’t consciously know when their bucket is empty. It’s something we can’t recognize because most of us don’t understand it. It is a feeling or an emotion; and being able to pinpoint emotions is difficult for most people.
Even if a person knew that his or her “bucket gauge” was on empty, it’s highly unlikely that the person would ask for feedback from others–especially men, because it would show weakness. If women are the better communicators, like some people say, and if they are more intuitive, again like some experts say, then maybe women would be better suited to know when their bucket was empty, and maybe they might be more able to ask for help.
So how can you know if one of your employee’s feedback bucket is running low? Typically, a problem with inadequate feedback will show up in one or more of six ways.
1. A person’s work performance (quantity and quality of work) is quite often directly related to the amount of feedback in his or her bucket. It doesn’t mean that a person will stop working when their bucket’s empty, but sustained performance over time requires at least some feedback in the bucket. So if you see an employee’s performance beginning to erode try stepping up your feedback to that person.
2. The ability to get along peaceably with co¬workers and even work effectively as a team is also directly related to how much feedback those people recently received. Workers are less likely to demonstrate patience, cooperation, understanding or tolerance when their feedback buckets are empty, or even near empty. So when you want a group of employees to become a team of employees, be sure that your feedback to them is frequent and positive.
3. Employees with empty buckets are prone to be followers, rather than take the initiative to be leaders. Followers wait for things to happen, while leaders take the initiative and make things happen. That’s because followers don’t feel as though it’s their job. Decision–making is an integral part of demonstrating initiative. Why make the effort to take a risk and make a decision if it’s not your job in the first place? So if you see employees lacking in initiative, step up your feedback.
4. People suffering from feedback deprivation commonly engage in destructive communication and people whose buckets are fairly full frequently engage in constructive communication. The simple cause of complaining, griping and back-biting, especially in the break room, may be nothing more than a number of employees who have been ignored too long and their buckets are running on empty. So when you become aware of destructive communication, step up your feedback.
5. Each day most of us make a decision to either get up and go to work, or roll over and go back to sleep. Part of that decision is centered on how much feedback we have received recently. A fair portion of time and attendance issues, such as being late or absent, could he prevented if managers invested more time in giving appropriate feedback to employees.
6. A few years ago a group of Outback restaurants implemented a program to reduce turnover among part¬-time employees. Each member of management was required to do three things each day to every part-time employee. They were to look the employee in the eye, use his or her first name, and ask a question about how their day was going. So to a part-time employee who was a student and worked the evening shift the comment might be, “Ann, how was your day at school?” Sounds simple, doesn’t it? But within six months Outback had slashed part-time employee turnover in those restaurants by a whopping 50 percent! How important is feedback? Ask those employees.
So what can you do as a manager to make deposits in employees’ buckets and to even plug up a few holes? There are four easy, but important strategies you might consider.
1. The quantity of feedback you give someone is important, but the quality is even more important. An idle comment may be welcome, but a question about how your midterm exam went yesterday could be a huge deposit. How much do you really know about your employees? Do you know how they spend their spare time? Do you know their hobbies? Are you concerned about them as an important part of your team? Take a few minutes and find out. And then fill a bucket!
2. Employees who receive appropriate and timely praise and recognition for their contributions to the company feel better about themselves. Feelings of being valuable and a contributor to the company can plug a few holes. Many books have been written about how to recognize employees, but the regrettable truth is that few managers consistently use the principle of praise and recognition appropriately. Look for both individual and group achievement and then make a fuss, and do it where a number of people can hear.
3. The third tactic to plug holes and make feedback deposits is to celebrate achievements. Too often managers believe that results are to be expected. It’s why we give you a paycheck, so we don’t need to celebrate individual successes. However, if you don’t pay attention to individual and group achievements, you’ll never know who crosses the finish line. Work at knowing who is achieving and then celebrate those achievements with your employees.
4. The extent to which any employee embraces changes to operating procedures or organizational structure is directly related to how much feedback that employee has been given regarding why the changes are necessary. Remember, feedback is a two way street. It doesn’t just flow from the manager to the employee. It needs to flow from the employee to the manager too. When employees are asked for their feedback regarding potential changes, they are much more likely to embrace the change after it is implemented. Ensure that feedback flows in both directions.
In this article we’ve looked at the feedback bucket. I like the metaphor because its uniqueness is so memorable to my students. Take a serious look at your employees this month and determine which buckets are running too low. Then, make some major deposits in those buckets. Use the techniques in this article. You’ll like the results.
Tags: coaching feedback, corrective feedback, employee feedback, feedback, positive reinforcement
Posted in feedback, leadership, management | No Comments »
Monday, November 7th, 2011
 In a previous discussion, I discussed a rather strange metaphor called the “Feedback Bucket.” It represents how the interpersonal feedback each of us receives goes into our feedback bucket. Feedback, we learned, leaks out over time because there are holes in the bottom of the bucket. We learned where holes come from and some was to plug them up. Hopefully, you’ve had a chance to think about the bucket metaphor.
In this article we’re going to briefly look at the four types of interpersonal feedback that go into the bucket. The feedback bucket is placed in the middle of a model, because all feedback, whether positive or negative, desired or undesired, flows into the bucket. Mentally healthy people prefer positive feedback, but with an empty bucket, a person will actually look forward to negative feedback. That’s because the emotional pain of an empty bucket is greater than the pain of inappropriate feedback. The four types of interpersonal feedback are supportive, corrective, insignificant and abusive. In future articles, we’ll discuss about methods of delivering supportive and corrective feedback, and find out how to minimize insignificant feedback and avoid abusive feedback.
The primary purpose of supportive feedback is to reinforce a behavior you want repeated. When someone gives a behavior that you would like repeated, the most important thing you can do is make a strong supportive deposit in that person’s feedback bucket reinforcing that specific behavior. If you don’t, because you’re too busy, or you don’t think it’s necessary, you may not see that behavior repeated any time soon.
The purpose of corrective feedback is to change a behavior. If a person’s behavior needs to be changed, the best chance of making that happen is properly applied corrective feedback. The problem is that many people don’t know how to give corrective feedback-they confuse abusive feedback for corrective feedback. Without training and practice, most people are ineffective at giving corrective feedback: it can be a challenging conversation.
Feedback that has little importance or meaning, or carries little impact is called insignificant–because compared to other types, it really is insignificant. Feedback that is so vague or general that the person receiving it could be unsure of its purpose is likely to feel insignificant. Too many of us use insignificant feedback believing it will have a huge positive effect. Actually, it doesn’t. It brings only a minimal response from the other person for a short period of time.
All other types of feedback fall into the fourth category called abusive feedback. So in other words, the feedback you give other people in your interpersonal relationships is supportive, corrective, insignificant, or abusive. And the type of feedback you choose not only determines the response you are likely to get, but it also defines the quality of the relationship.
It’s usually at this point in my workshops when someone asks, “So when I’m upset at someone, and tell them to ’shape up or ship out,’ I’m actually abusing that person?”
When asked that question. I respond with, “When you tell someone to ’shape up or ship out: are you supporting a behavior you want repeated, or are you trying to correct a specific behavior you want changed?”
If it’s obvious that telling a person to “shape up or ship out” is an effort to get an improvement in performance. In other words, it’s an attempt at corrective feedback. But it’s not. It’s actually abusive feedback—and if it works at all, you’ve most likely damaged the relationship and you’ll probably have to solve the same problem again tomorrow.
Consider the example of Jerry, a produce manager in a fairly large supermarket. For several years he consistently produced good financial numbers for the store. He was a dedicated leader of his crew and did his best to demonstrate good customer service. Clearly, he was one of the best produce managers in his company. A new store manager decided to leave Jerry alone, because as he said, “Jerry obviously didn’t need my help.” The new store manager’s rationale was that he had “more important problems to solve than to waste his time in the produce department.” Over the course of a year Jerry’s numbers began to fall. He became disenchanted with the routine of the job and the pressure of controlling a critical perishable department began to wear on him. Finally, he told his district manager that he was considering quitting. When asked why, he said, “This place isn’t worth it anymore.”
Fortunately, the district manager was sharp and looked for the root cause of’ the problem. What he discovered was a produce manager who had been deprived of attention (feedback) from the new store manager. The previous store manager had regularly given supportive feedback to Jerry, but the new manager focused his attention elsewhere.
The interesting part of this example is what happened to Jerry when the district manager helped the store manager improve his coaching shills. The store manager began spending a few minutes each day in the produce department discussing successes, plans and issues. He offered suggestions and asked for Jerry’s ideas. At first Jerry was skeptical of the change, thinking there might be a hidden agenda. But after the store manager faced up to his culpability in the situation and apologized for what he had done, Jerry’s performance began to improve. In fact, within 90 days the old Jerry was back. Department gross returned and complaints disappeared. So how much do people need feedback? Ask Jerry; he has a strong opinion about how important it is.
As we analyze the example of Jerry and his store manager we see that the amount and type of feedback a person receives are directly related to a number of workplace issues. For example, as appropriate feedback declines, and/or as inappropriate feedback increases respect and then shortly thereafter trust, decline. Note that Jerry’s reaction to his store manager’s attempt at coaching was met with skepticism. When there are deficiencies in feedback, it is very common to experience problems with respect, trust, performance, production, honesty, teamwork and morale. Very few people are able to consistently deliver a high level of work production and a positive mental attitude while not receiving appropriate feedback in their bucket.
In a future discussion, we’ll look specifically at supportive feedback and see how it can be used to not only reinforce good behaviors, but also correct some minor problems as well. In the meantime, get a general sense of what percent of your overall feedback to employees is supportive, corrective, insignificant or abusive.
Tags: Corporate Feedback, effective feedback strategies, effective feedback techniques, feedback, guidelines for providing effective feedback
Posted in feedback | No Comments »
Thursday, October 27th, 2011
In previous articles we have looked at the importance of interpersonal feedback in both our personal and professional lives. Feedback is so fundamental to our interpersonal relationships that most people believe they have an innate ability to deliver it. But, in fact, most people are actually ineffective in delivering feedback. Perhaps the reason is that too many of us tend to gloss over what we believe are the simple things and pay more attention to what we believe to be complex or difficult. Whatever the reason, feedback is the foundational element of all successful interpersonal relationships. With effective feedback relationships can work, and without it relationships are doomed to failure. The regrettable truth is that far too many people, both at home and at work, demonstrate poor feedback skills. That’s why we have spent eight months learning to be more effective in delivering feedback!
Feedback is the fourth most important ingredient of life for a mentally healthy human. It follows only air, water and food on the list of basic human needs. Appropriate feedback brings people a level of comfort that is difficult to achieve from any other source. Inappropriate feedback creates a level of discomfort and friction that commonly produces undesired behaviors. The ability to deliver feedback, therefore, really ought to be taught as a basic interpersonal skill. Regrettably, most people are left to figure out how to deliver feedback on their own.
One of the best ways to learn feedback skills is to associate with people who do it well. Although I’ve worked for many people, two former bosses in the retail industry come to mind. Richard, for example, was a boss who had exceptional feedback skills, while Joe had unbelievably poor skills. While working for Richard I found myself looking for ways to be more effective in my job responsibilities, as well as looking for ways to help him in his responsibilities.
Joe, on the other hand, made me frustrated, uninvolved, worry-prone, and sometimes less than productive. I recall for example, a time when I was summoned to Joe’s office for an unscheduled meeting. As I hurried up the back stairway to his office, I convinced myself that something was wrong. I was certain that I was in a hurry to attend a chew-out session. My imagination ran wild in the few minutes it took me to reach his office with numerous possibilities, all negative. But then, when the meeting began I found out that the reason I had been summoned was to merely give me some information that I needed for a project I was working on. There wasn’t a problem; I wasn’t getting fired; nothing was wrong; I wasn’t even in trouble. And all of my worry had been for nothing.
The reason my mind ran wild with negative possibilities that day was due to the poor relationship I had with Joe. His failure to give me the feedback that I so desperately needed to nourish OUT relationship caused me to not only distrust him and the situation, but to also expect the worst to happen. Even though I had studied the principles of feedback and was well aware of its effects on people, both positive and negative, I was nonetheless unable to separate myself from assuming the worst. That’s because I need supportive feedback, just like you and everyone else.
Contrast that experience to the time I worked for Richard. He went out of his way to listen to my ideas, counsel my aspirations, and coach my behavior. When I was successful lie noticed and gave me supportive feedback. When I was less than successful he corrected me with appropriate feedback that did not damage my self-worth. When I spoke he listened with his full attention. When he asked for my opinion I knew full well that my good ideas would be implemented without question or reservation. Richard knew me, my wife’s name, details about my children’s lives, my goals, my strengths, my weaknesses, my worries, and my fears. In short, he knew me because he cared about me. And because he knew me, he gave me feedback,
So how was my performance for Richard, as compared to Joe? I would like to think that I perform well, regardless of how I’m coached, but that’s not true. I contributed to both Richard and Joe, but I clearly pushed harder, longer and better for Richard, because he gave me the feedback I desired. Of that I have no doubt!
In a previous article we learned a metaphor called the Feedback Bucket. The feedback we receive, both positive and negative, goes into our Feedback Bucket. The problem is that life’s experiences drill holes in our buckets, so the feedback we receive leaks out over time. That’s why we need a constant amount of feedback each day to keep our bucket from running dry.
People with empty buckets behave differently than people whose buckets have recently received feedback. Empty buckets at work can lead to lower productivity, dishonesty, increased turnover, poor attendance, lower accuracy, poor customer service, and a less than caring attitude toward job responsibilities. Empty buckets at home can lead to spouses seeking fulfillment elsewhere, and children seeking reinforcement from kids on the streets.
The power of supportive feedback is incredible! A phrase every person should memorize is: “A behavior rewarded (with supportive feedback) tends to be repeated.” At work and at home, when you see a behavior you like or one that leads to desired results, it is vital that you reinforce the behavior with a carefully worded feedback statement.
Over the last few weeks, we looked at the methods of using corrective feedback to change behavior. It’s important to develop effective techniques, because perceived criticism in interpersonal relationships has such negative consequences. We learned that on occasion behavior change can be accomplished with supportive feedback, especially if the person’s Feedback Bucket is low. A second technique is to use a series of focused questions that direct the person to suggest a change in their own behavior. And the third technique is to use an assertive statement that specifically describes the needed behavior changes.
 In previous articles we have looked at the importance of interpersonal feedback in both our personal and professional lives. Feedback is so fundamental to our interpersonal relationships that most people believe they have an innate ability to deliver it. But, in fact, most people are actually ineffective in delivering feedback. Perhaps the reason is that too many of us tend to gloss over what we believe are the simple things andpay more attention to what we believe to be complex or difficult. Whatever the reason, feedback is the foundational element of all successful interpersonal relationships. With effective feedback relationships can work, and without it relationships are doomed to failure. The regrettable truth is that far too many people, both at home and at work, demonstrate poor feedback skills. That’s why we have spent eight months learning to be more effective in delivering feedback!
Feedback is the fourth most important ingredient of life for a mentally healthy human. It follows only air, water and food on the list of basic human needs. Appropriate feedback brings people a level of comfort that is difficult to achieve from any other source. Inappropriate feedback creates a level of discomfort and friction that commonly produces undesired behaviors. The ability to deliver feedback, therefore, really ought to be taught as a basic interpersonal skill. Regrettably, most people are left to figure out how to deliver feedback on their own.
One of the best ways to learn feedback skills is to associate with people who do it well. Although I’ve worked for many people, two former bosses in the retail industry come to mind. Richard, for example, was a boss who had exceptional feedback skills, while Joe had unbelievably poor skills. While working for Richard I found myself looking for ways to be more effective in my job responsibilities, as well as looking for ways to help him in his responsibilities.
Joe, on the other hand, made me frustrated, uninvolved, worry-prone, and sometimes less than productive. I recall for example, a time when I was summoned to Joe’s office for an unscheduled meeting. As I hurried up the back stairway to his office, I convinced myself that something was wrong. I was certain that I was in a hurry to attend a chew-out session. My imagination ran wild in the few minutes it took me to reach his office with numerous possibilities, all negative. But then, when the meeting began I found out that the reason I had been summoned was to merely give me some information that I needed for a project I was working on. There wasn’t a problem; I wasn’t getting fired; nothing was wrong; I wasn’t even in trouble. And all of my worry had been for nothing.
The reason my mind ran wild with negative possibilities that day was due to the poor relationship I had with Joe. His failure to give me the feedback that I so desperately needed to nourish OUT relationship caused me to not only distrust him and the situation, but to also expect the worst to happen. Even though I had studied the principles of feedback and was well aware of its effects on people, both positive and negative, I was nonetheless unable to separate myself from assuming the worst. That’s because I need supportive feedback, just like you and everyone else.
Contrast that experience to the time I worked for Richard. He went out of his way to listen to my ideas, counsel my aspirations, and coach my behavior. When I was successful lie noticed and gave me supportive feedback. When I was less than successful he corrected me with appropriate feedback that did not damage my self-worth. When I spoke he listened with his full attention. When he asked for my opinion I knew full well that my good ideas would be implemented without question or reservation. Richard knew me, my wife’s name, details about my children’s lives, my goals, my strengths, my weaknesses, my worries, and my fears. In short, he knew me because he cared about me. And because he knew me, he gave me feedback,
So how was my performance for Richard, as compared to Joe? I would like to think that I perform well, regardless of how I’m coached, but that’s not true. I contributed to both Richard and Joe, but I clearly pushed harder, longer and better for Richard, because he gave me the feedback I desired. Of that I have no doubt!
In a previous article we learned a metaphor called the Feedback Bucket. The feedback we receive, both positive and negative, goes into our Feedback Bucket. The problem is that life’s experiences drill holes in our buckets, so the feedback we receive leaks out over time. That’s why we need a constant amount of feedback each day to keep our bucket from running dry.
People with empty buckets behave differently than people whose buckets have recently received feedback. Empty buckets at work can lead to lower productivity, dishonesty, increased turnover, poor attendance, lower accuracy, poor customer service, and a less than caring attitude toward job responsibilities. Empty buckets at home can lead to spouses seeking fulfillment elsewhere, and children seeking reinforcement from kids on the streets.
The power of supportive feedback is incredible! A phrase every person should memorize is: “A behavior rewarded (with supportive feedback) tends to be repeated.” At work and at home, when you see a behavior you like or one that leads to desired results, it is vital that you reinforce the behavior with a carefully worded feedback statement.
Over the last few weeks, we looked at the methods of using corrective feedback to change behavior. It’s important to develop effective techniques, because perceived criticism in interpersonal relationships has such negative consequences. We learned that on occasion behavior change can be accomplished with supportive feedback, especially if the person’s Feedback Bucket is low. A second technique is to use a series of focused questions that direct the person to suggest a change in their own behavior. And the third technique is to use an assertive statement that specifically describes the needed behavior changes.
Tags: coaching feedback, delivering feedback, employee feedback, feedback
Posted in feedback | No Comments »
Friday, October 14th, 2011
Last time we learned how to transfer ownership of the problem and solution to the employee (don’t forget this works at home with a son or daughter) by asking a series of directed but open-ended questions. We learned that if the employee will accept ownership of the problem and solution, there is a high likelihood of long-lasting success. If, for whatever reason, you don’t use directed questions and resort to imposing a solution, there is a possibility that any change in behavior will be temporary. That means the conversation will happen again, and most likely very soon. So if you find yourself dealing with the same problems over and over, perhaps the entire problem isn’t the employee, but it might be the method you have chosen to deal with it.
In this discussion, we’re going to look at the most effective method of imposing a solution, assuming supportive feedback and/or a series of directed questions haven’t been successful. There are situations where neither supportive feedback, nor asking directed questions will get the desired behavior change. Perhaps it’s because of the differences in people, or maybe it has to do with the fact that some people are downright stubborn. The truth is that some situations are difficult and can even be explosive. And remember, sometimes things don’t go as planned. Whatever the reason, managers (parents too) need a direct technique that can work in those situations. In my 30 plus years of dealing with people and a manager and coach, I’ve seen this .final technique work in situations where the others have failed. I hope you’ll notice that it is very similar to the supportive feedback strategy that we learned in a previous discussion.
I learned many years ago that the most effective managers seem to work on their effectiveness at home and then bring those techniques to work. For that reason, let me use an example from home one that commonly plagues many American households. Assume, for this example, that you have a teenager whose bedroom needs a serious cleaning. It’s been cluttered and dirty for a long time. Assume also that you’ve tried supportive feedback and directed questions, but neither has generated any behavior change. So now you decide to impose a solution with an assertive statement. After considering your approach, you choose the right time and place for the discussion. Sitting your son down you begin.
“Junior, for several weeks you have neglected your bedroom. There are dirty clothes and discarded food wrappers on the floor. Your room hasn’t been cleaned for a long time. You have lived with trash and clutter for so long that I fear it has become a way of life. Quite frankly, I feel embarrassed to have anyone see your room, because it lowers the standard of our entire family. I need you to take better care of your room. What can I do to help?”
The same technique could be used at work. Consider a stocker who has repeatedly ignored a particular section. Once again, assume you’ve tried supportive feedback and directed questions in an attempt to change behavior, but they haven’t worked. So, you resort to an assertive statement. Using the same formula, the statement could go something like this.
“Sam, for several weeks you have neglected this section. Every day this week, for example, we’ve had at least a dozen out of stocks. I’ve checked the back room and there’s back stock that could be worked in, but for some reason it stays in the back room. I worry that your behavior these past weeks has become a habit. Frankly, I’m embarrassed for our customers and employees in this store to see this section, because it lowers the standard of our entire store. I need you to take better care of this section. I need you to take the responsibility of working the back stock in even before the nuts appear. Now, what could I do to help?”
So, what do you think? Would an assertive statement work? What are the odds that “Junior” or “Sam” will change their behavior? And more importantly, what are the odds that any behavior change will be long-lasting? That might be the more significant question.
The answer is that assertive statements can produce long-term behavior change, but not as often as using supportive feedback or directed questions. But as a final attempt to change behavior, it’s something you need to try. And sometimes, it will work. I’ve been surprised in numerous situations where I made an assertive statement believing it was a futile attempt, only to discover that it worked.
In each of the two examples above, a formula was used. Did you see the similarities? The formula empowers the technique with the possibility of success, because it is constructed in such a way that the receiver gets a very strong message, without damaging personal self-worth. Note also that the formula includes specifics about the undesirable behaviors and their consequences. Another thing the formula does is to approach the employee on a “feelings” level. Our feelings about undesired behaviors can be as powerful in changing behavior as a description of the behavior itself. Too many managers fail to include their feelings about a situation because they feel uncomfortable when describing their feelings. Don’t avoid describing your feelings: use them. Your feelings can be a powerful tool.
The formula used in the examples is as follows: Assertive statements to correct behavior:
1. Describe the specific behavior.
2. Describe the consequences of the behavior.
3. Describe how you feel about the behavior.
4. Describe why you ‘feel that way.
5. Describe what you need changed.
Frankly, of the three methods we’ve learned in this series of three discussion on correcting behavior—supportive feedback, directed questions and assertive statements—I like directed questions most. That technique works more for me, on average, than the other two methods. Remember though, that being skilled in all three methods will give you options. And having options can make you a more effective manager at changing behavior and driving results.
Last time we learned how to transfer ownership of the problem and solution to the employee (don’t forget this works at home with a son or daughter) by asking a series of directed but open-ended questions. We learned that if the employee will accept ownership of the problem and solution, there is a high likelihood of long-lasting success. If, for whatever reason, you don’t use directed questions and resort to imposing a solution, there is a possibility that any change in behavior will be temporary. That means the conversation will happen again,  and most likely very soon. So if you find yourself dealing with the same problems over and over, perhaps the entire problem isn’t the employee, but it might be the method you have chosen to deal with it.
In this discussion, we’re going to look at the most effective method of imposing a solution, assuming supportive feedback and/or a series of directed questions haven’t been successful. There are situations where neither supportive feedback, nor asking directed questions will get the desired behavior change. Perhaps it’s because of the differences in people, or maybe it has to do with the fact that some people are downright stubborn. The truth is that some situations are difficult and can even be explosive. And remember, sometimes things don’t go as planned. Whatever the reason, managers (parents too) need a direct technique that can work in those situations. In my 30 plus years of dealing with people and a manager and coach, I’ve seen this .final technique work in situations where the others have failed. I hope you’ll notice that it is very similar to the supportive feedback strategy that we learned in a previous discussion.
I learned many years ago that the most effective managers seem to work on their effectiveness at home and then bring those techniques to work. For that reason, let me use an example from home one that commonly plagues many American households. Assume, for this example, that you have a teenager whose bedroom needs a serious cleaning. It’s been cluttered and dirty for a long time. Assume also that you’ve tried supportive feedback and directed questions, but neither has generated any behavior change. So now you decide to impose a solution with an assertive statement. After considering your approach, you choose the right time and place for the discussion. Sitting your son down you begin.
“Junior, for several weeks you have neglected your bedroom. There are dirty clothes and discarded food wrappers on the floor. Your room hasn’t been cleaned for a long time. You have lived with trash and clutter for so long that I fear it has become a way of life. Quite frankly, I feel embarrassed to have anyone see your room, because it lowers the standard of our entire family. I need you to take better care of your room. What can I do to help?”
The same technique could be used at work. Consider a stocker who has repeatedly ignored a particular section. Once again, assume you’ve tried supportive feedback and directed questions in an attempt to change behavior, but they haven’t worked. So, you resort to an assertive statement. Using the same formula, the statement could go something like this.
“Sam, for several weeks you have neglected this section. Every day this week, for example, we’ve had at least a dozen out of stocks. I’ve checked the back room and there’s back stock that could be worked in, but for some reason it stays in the back room. I worry that your behavior these past weeks has become a habit. Frankly, I’m embarrassed for our customers and employees in this store to see this section, because it lowers the standard of our entire store. I need you to take better care of this section. I need you to take the responsibility of working the back stock in even before the nuts appear. Now, what could I do to help?”
So, what do you think? Would an assertive statement work? What are the odds that “Junior” or “Sam” will change their behavior? And more importantly, what are the odds that any behavior change will be long-lasting? That might be the more significant question.
The answer is that assertive statements can produce long-term behavior change, but not as often as using supportive feedback or directed questions. But as a final attempt to change behavior, it’s something you need to try. And sometimes, it will work. I’ve been surprised in numerous situations where I made an assertive statement believing it was a futile attempt, only to discover that it worked.
In each of the two examples above, a formula was used. Did you see the similarities? The formula empowers the technique with the possibility of success, because it is constructed in such a way that the receiver gets a very strong message, without damaging personal self-worth. Note also that the formula includes specifics about the undesirable behaviors and their consequences. Another thing the formula does is to approach the employee on a “feelings” level. Our feelings about undesired behaviors can be as powerful in changing behavior as a description of the behavior itself. Too many managers fail to include their feelings about a situation because they feel uncomfortable when describing their feelings. Don’t avoid describing your feelings: use them. Your feelings can be a powerful tool.
The formula used in the examples is as follows: Assertive statements to correct behavior:
1. Describe the specific behavior.
2. Describe the consequences of the behavior.
3. Describe how you feel about the behavior.
4. Describe why you ‘feel that way.
5. Describe what you need changed.
Frankly, of the three methods we’ve learned in this series of three discussion on correcting behavior—supportive feedback, directed questions and assertive statements—I like directed questions most. That technique works more for me, on average, than the other two methods. Remember though, that being skilled in all three methods will give you options. And having options can make you a more effective manager at changing behavior and driving results.
Tags: behavior, corrective feedback, corrective feedback example, employee feedback, feedback
Posted in feedback | No Comments »
Monday, October 10th, 2011
In last discussion, we learned how supportive feedback can be used in certain situations to correct behavior. In part two of our discussion on corrective feedback we will look at another method of changing behavior (assuming attempts with supportive feedback didn’t work). The technique we’ll learn in this article focuses on transferring ownership of the problem and its solution to the other person. By transferring problem/solution ownership to the employee, you have a much better chance of a long-lasting solution without the collateral damage that oftentimes happens when you use the traditional methods of telling, selling or threatening.
The scenario we’ll use as a demonstration of this technique involves a son who appears unwilling to make a decision regarding what to do following his high school graduation. The technique used with the son is the same as what you would use with an employee for a similar problem. So as you read this scenario, pay close attention to not only how it is done, but also how you could use it with an employee. I’ll call my son “Junior.”
“Thanks for coming with me to get some pizza. There is something important that I’d like to discuss with you. (By referring to this discussion as “important,” I’m clarifying the son’s expectations as to what is about to happen.)
“I’m concerned about what appears to be a lack of direction in your life. You’re 17 now and graduation is only a few months away. What would you like to be doing a year from now?” (A statement of perception is a good place to begin.)
“I dunno,” Junior said. (This is a common phrase when people either really don’t know the answer, or when they don’t want to give an answer. It’s important to not let an “I dunno” get by you.)
“I think you do know. I know you like to be with your friends, and you like to work with computers and play computer games. You know what you like, and what you don’t. So it’s likely that you’ve given a little thought to next year. I respect you, so I’ll respect your answer.” (This statement challenges the “I dunno” response. Its purpose is to get the other person back on track.)
“Tell me what would you like to be doing in a year?” (The purpose of this question is to get the other person to project his/her thinking away from the immediacy and confusion of today and think forward to a year in the future.)
“I guess going to school.”
“That’s a really good answer.” (Note the use of supportive feedback when I get an answer that helps.)
“What would you like to be doing in five years?” (Now I ask a question that forces him to think even more into the future.)
“Five years after I start school, I guess I would be graduated.”
“That’s where you’ll be in five years. Tell me what you would like to be doing in five years.” (Note that he didn’t answer the question I asked. This is common among people who haven’t been trained to listen. So rephrased my question and asked it again.)
“Some of my friends know exactly what they want to do, but I’m not sure. It might be something with computers.”
“So some of your friends already have a direction in mind. How do you feel about your friends knowing what they want to do, and you being undecided?” (I went to his feelings about the situation, because they can motivate him far better than my threats or admonitions.)
“It bothers me.”
“It sounds like you’re bothered by not knowing, but if you chose today, it might be something in the computer field (I paraphrased his comment back to him so that he can hear what he said, and he knows I’m listening.)
“That’s right.”
“Some people can get confused about a solution to a problem, because they can’t see all the complicated details to the solution. It’s possible that the problem you’re having deciding is in part based on how complex the computer field has become. How close am I?” (Without appearing to be judgmental, I tried to summarize what he might be feeling. At 17 years old he most likely doesn’t understand his inner feelings. Emotional maturity, or understanding feelings, doesn’t occur for most people 22-26 years of age.)
“Well, it is large, and I’m not sure if I want to work in systems, networks, programming, or whatever. I just don’t know.”
“That is exactly my point. I would be confused too. Most people would:” (This statement shows my empathy and respect for his feelings.)
“Tell me, is it absolutely necessary for a first-year computer student to decide his specialty before he begins any classes? What do you think?” (Now I made him consider a critical question.)
“Maybe it’s not.”
“I’m sure it’s not,” (This is supportive feedback again.)
“So if you would like to be graduated with some type of a degree in computers in five years, and you would like to be working toward that goal one year from today by going to school, what do you need to do this week in order to help you achieve those goals?” (This is the question I had in mind from the beginning of the discussion. It, clearly, is the most important question of the discussion. The son’s answer tells me if I’ve been successful.)
“Get ready for graduation and send in my application to the community college.”
“That’s exactly right. What could I do to help?” (I agreed, and then offered supportive feedback.)
Over many years of dealing with people–some who have been cooperative and some less than cooperative–I have developed a series of steps that can be used in a progression from mild intervention to serious intervention. You already know that the first step in this progression is to try supportive feedback. The second step is to transfer problem/solution ownership by using a series of open-end questions, such as the demonstration above. But now what do you do if neither of those techniques work? That will be the subject in the next discussion on corrective feedback. Look for an opportunity, at home or at work, to try transferring problem/solution ownership.
 In last discussion, we learned how supportive feedback can be used in certain situations to correct behavior. In part two of our discussion on corrective feedback we will look at another method of changing behavior (assuming attempts with supportive feedback didn’t work). The technique we’ll learn in this article focuses on transferring ownership of the problem and its solution to the other person. By transferring problem/solution ownership to the employee, you have a much better chance of a long-lasting solution without the collateral damage that oftentimes happens when you use the traditional methods of telling, selling or threatening.
The scenario we’ll use as a demonstration of this technique involves a son who appears unwilling to make a decision regarding what to do following his high school graduation. The technique used with the son is the same as what you would use with an employee for a similar problem. So as you read this scenario, pay close attention to not only how it is done, but also how you could use it with an employee. I’ll call my son “Junior.”
“Thanks for coming with me to get some pizza. There is something important that I’d like to discuss with you. (By referring to this discussion as “important,” I’m clarifying the son’s expectations as to what is about to happen.)
“I’m concerned about what appears to be a lack of direction in your life. You’re 17 now and graduation is only a few months away. What would you like to be doing a year from now?” (A statement of perception is a good place to begin.)
“I dunno,” Junior said. (This is a common phrase when people either really don’t know the answer, or when they don’t want to give an answer. It’s important to not let an “I dunno” get by you.)
“I think you do know. I know you like to be with your friends, and you like to work with computers and play computer games. You know what you like, and what you don’t. So it’s likely that you’ve given a little thought to next year. I respect you, so I’ll respect your answer.” (This statement challenges the “I dunno” response. Its purpose is to get the other person back on track.)
“Tell me what would you like to be doing in a year?” (The purpose of this question is to get the other person to project his/her thinking away from the immediacy and confusion of today and think forward to a year in the future.)
“I guess going to school.”
“That’s a really good answer.” (Note the use of supportive feedback when I get an answer that helps.)
“What would you like to be doing in five years?” (Now I ask a question that forces him to think even more into the future.)
“Five years after I start school, I guess I would be graduated.”
“That’s where you’ll be in five years. Tell me what you would like to be doing in five years.” (Note that he didn’t answer the question I asked. This is common among people who haven’t been trained to listen. So rephrased my question and asked it again.)
“Some of my friends know exactly what they want to do, but I’m not sure. It might be something with computers.”
“So some of your friends already have a direction in mind. How do you feel about your friends knowing what they want to do, and you being undecided?” (I went to his feelings about the situation, because they can motivate him far better than my threats or admonitions.)
“It bothers me.”
“It sounds like you’re bothered by not knowing, but if you chose today, it might be something in the computer field (I paraphrased his comment back to him so that he can hear what he said, and he knows I’m listening.)
“That’s right.”
“Some people can get confused about a solution to a problem, because they can’t see all the complicated details to the solution. It’s possible that the problem you’re having deciding is in part based on how complex the computer field has become. How close am I?” (Without appearing to be judgmental, I tried to summarize what he might be feeling. At 17 years old he most likely doesn’t understand his inner feelings. Emotional maturity, or understanding feelings, doesn’t occur for most people 22-26 years of age.)
“Well, it is large, and I’m not sure if I want to work in systems, networks, programming, or whatever. I just don’t know.”
“That is exactly my point. I would be confused too. Most people would:” (This statement shows my empathy and respect for his feelings.)
“Tell me, is it absolutely necessary for a first-year computer student to decide his specialty before he begins any classes? What do you think?” (Now I made him consider a critical question.)
“Maybe it’s not.”
“I’m sure it’s not,” (This is supportive feedback again.)
“So if you would like to be graduated with some type of a degree in computers in five years, and you would like to be working toward that goal one year from today by going to school, what do you need to do this week in order to help you achieve those goals?” (This is the question I had in mind from the beginning of the discussion. It, clearly, is the most important question of the discussion. The son’s answer tells me if I’ve been successful.)
“Get ready for graduation and send in my application to the community college.”
“That’s exactly right. What could I do to help?” (I agreed, and then offered supportive feedback.)
Over many years of dealing with people–some who have been cooperative and some less than cooperative–I have developed a series of steps that can be used in a progression from mild intervention to serious intervention. You already know that the first step in this progression is to try supportive feedback. The second step is to transfer problem/solution ownership by using a series of open-end questions, such as the demonstration above. But now what do you do if neither of those techniques work? That will be the subject in the next discussion on corrective feedback. Look for an opportunity, at home or at work, to try transferring problem/solution ownership.
Tags: Changing behavior, corrective feedback, feedback
Posted in feedback | No Comments »
Monday, August 15th, 2011
In earlier discussions, we’ve looked at the importance of interpersonal feedback. We’ve learned that there are four types of feedback: supportive, corrective, insignificant and abusive. We learned that the feedback we receive goes into our “Feedback Bucket,” but it leaks out over time for a variety of reasons. As a result, most of us need constant nourishing of our bucket to prevent it from draining dry.
This time we’ll look at supportive feedback, arguably the most important of the four types. But unfortunately, even those persons who think they know how to deliver supportive feedback oftentimes do so ineffectively.
Believe it or not, one of the best ways to understand supportive feedback is to visit one of the Sea World marine parks watching the trainers reinforce animal behavior! What the trainers do at Sea World isn’t a secret. In their shows they openly explain how positive reinforcement is used to change and model animal behavior.
One of the techniques the trainers use involves a long pole with a white pad on one end called a target. I’ve used a miniature version of the target as a demonstration in my workshops. First, I find a participant who loves Snickers & candy bars. I begin by touching the padded end of the target to the nose of my subject and then offering candy as a reward. This process is repeated several times until the subject gets the connection that touching the nose equals a desired reward.
Then I move the target close to the subject’s nose, but not touching it. In order to get the candy the subject must lean forward the final few inches. This process is repeated as I gradually increase the distance. To complete the demonstration, I hold the target above the person’s head, which requires the person to stand on a chair in order to get the reward. It’s at that point that I ask, “Now do you understand how Sea World can get Shamu to jump over twenty feet out of the water and splash on all the human fools who sit in the “Splash Zone.”
So what does Shamu have to do with giving supportive feedback? Consider a clerk who for several years has covered an important afternoon and evening shift several days each week. Her busy schedule is a difficult balancing act as a part-time student, mother, and clerk, but she does well in all three areas. In the office, she has been cooperative, responsible and dependable. She could even be on a short-list for advancement if the circumstances warranted it.
Because of her ability and experience, she appears to need minimal supervision. As a result, over time the manager and other key members of management systematically ignore her. After all, as the saying goes, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” And don’t forget that a typical manager is forced to spend 80 percent of his or her time with 20 percent of the employees: the ones who create the problems. The clerk is certainly not in the 20 percent, so if there is an employee who can be ignored, she must be the one.
But don’t forget, this clerk has a feedback bucket—just like everyone else. She needs daily deposits of feedback-just like everyone else. And if she doesn’t get enough feedback, and her bucket drains dry, what do you think will happen to her being cooperative, responsible and dependable? Actually, this is a classic story of why good employees can lose their effectiveness. The interesting thing is that a person whose bucket drains dry and then whose job performance erodes may not even be aware of what happened or why it happened. All the clerk may be able to relate in all exit interview is that she has become bored with the job and the challenge and excitement are gone. This is a critical principle of managing others: consistent superior performance over time is directly related to the employee receiving enough appropriate feedback to keep the bucket from draining dry.
So what could the manager do to make a substantial deposit of feedback in the clerk’s bucket? What if the manager said to her, “Mary, I really appreciate what you were able to get accomplished yesterday.” You worked really well and I especially like that you cleaned up the files. As a result, we had a great head start on the invoices. I know how hectic the afternoon shift can be but you have a knack of making things happen. I want you to know how happy I am with what you did. You are an important part of our team. Thanks.”
It’s difficult to say how often Mary might need a substantial deposit of feedback like this one, but it needs to be on a frequency that her bucket can’t drain dry. And it needs to be specifically focused on her performance that contributes to departmental excellence. The manager must be aware of Mary’s job performance and then take the time to give her appropriate feedback.
The feedback the manager gave Mary follows a specific formula. Notice that it wasn’t atta boy, or atta girl, or way to go, or nice going, or keep it up, or looking good. All of those comments are okay, and people can feel better after hearing them. But they lack the power we oftentimes need to get the reaction we want, Atta boys and atta girls are insignificant feedback, because they lack the power of real supportive feedback.
The formula to deliver supportive feedback in the most powerful way is
1. Describe the specific behavior.
2. Describe the positive consequences of the behavior.
3. Describe how you feel about the behavior.
4. Describe why you feel that way.
First, the manager described specifically what Mary did, in other words her behaviors. Next, he explained the positive consequences of those behaviors. Then he told her how he feels about what she did. And finally, he explained why he feels the way he does. Each of the four steps is designed to focus the supportive feedback in a way to maximize its effect. An atta boy is less effective than this formula because it is so non-specific and unfocused. The recipient of an atta boy may not be able to connect the feedback with his or her behavior. The reason this formula works so well is that it supports the specific behavior that you want repeated, and it does so in a very powerful way. It is in this way that the supportive feedback formula is similar to the method used by Sea World to reinforce behaviors with the animals.
There are two directions you can take when giving supportive feedback. You can reinforce who the person is, inside, or you can reinforce a behavior the person does that you would like repeated. While both of these reinforcements are good and appropriate, knowing when to use each type, and how much of it to do can be confusing. It can take some time and practice in reading people to be able to discern how much reinforcement of a behavior is needed as compared to reinforcing the good nature of that person. Perhaps the reason it can be confusing is that both of these reinforcements are necessary, most especially to your children. The challenge is when to use each type. Actually, the two techniques are related. So whether you reinforce the person, or the behavior, you haven’t wasted your time. Good timings frequently happen as a result of either type of supportive feedback.
Because of the pressure to make a profit, too many managers have forgotten the importance of helping employees reduce or eliminate ineffective behaviors. One of the most effective ways I know of eliminating ineffective behaviors from employees is to fill their feedback buckets with supportive feedback. When your supportive feedback fills someone’s bucket, and makes them feel good inside, there is a much better chance that that person will act effectively and cause fewer problems in the future, In other words, a little investment of your time today will likely bring fewer problems tomorrow.
Sometimes, with some people, supportive feedback doesn’t work, In spite of your best efforts, whether you use the power formula or not, some people won’t react positively to supportive feedback. What do you do then? Is there a formula for those situations? We’ll look at those issues in the future.
 In earlier discussions, we’ve looked at the importance of interpersonal feedback. We’ve learned that there are four types of feedback: supportive, corrective, insignificant and abusive. We learned that the feedback we receive goes into our “Feedback Bucket,” but it leaks out over time for a variety of reasons. As a result, most of us need constant nourishing of our bucket to prevent it from draining dry.
This time we’ll look at supportive feedback, arguably the most important of the four types. But unfortunately, even those persons who think they know how to deliver supportive feedback oftentimes do so ineffectively.
Believe it or not, one of the best ways to understand supportive feedback is to visit one of the Sea World marine parks watching the trainers reinforce animal behavior! What the trainers do at Sea World isn’t a secret. In their shows they openly explain how positive reinforcement is used to change and model animal behavior.
One of the techniques the trainers use involves a long pole with a white pad on one end called a target. I’ve used a miniature version of the target as a demonstration in my workshops. First, I find a participant who loves Snickers & candy bars. I begin by touching the padded end of the target to the nose of my subject and then offering candy as a reward. This process is repeated several times until the subject gets the connection that touching the nose equals a desired reward.
Then I move the target close to the subject’s nose, but not touching it. In order to get the candy the subject must lean forward the final few inches. This process is repeated as I gradually increase the distance. To complete the demonstration, I hold the target above the person’s head, which requires the person to stand on a chair in order to get the reward. It’s at that point that I ask, “Now do you understand how Sea World can get Shamu to jump over twenty feet out of the water and splash on all the human fools who sit in the “Splash Zone.”
So what does Shamu have to do with giving supportive feedback? Consider a clerk who for several years has covered an important afternoon and evening shift several days each week. Her busy schedule is a difficult balancing act as a part-time student, mother, and clerk, but she does well in all three areas. In the office, she has been cooperative, responsible and dependable. She could even be on a short-list for advancement if the circumstances warranted it.
Because of her ability and experience, she appears to need minimal supervision. As a result, over time the manager and other key members of management systematically ignore her. After all, as the saying goes, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” And don’t forget that a typical manager is forced to spend 80 percent of his or her time with 20 percent of the employees: the ones who create the problems. The clerk is certainly not in the 20 percent, so if there is an employee who can be ignored, she must be the one.
But don’t forget, this clerk has a feedback bucket—just like everyone else. She needs daily deposits of feedback-just like everyone else. And if she doesn’t get enough feedback, and her bucket drains dry, what do you think will happen to her being cooperative, responsible and dependable? Actually, this is a classic story of why good employees can lose their effectiveness. The interesting thing is that a person whose bucket drains dry and then whose job performance erodes may not even be aware of what happened or why it happened. All the clerk may be able to relate in all exit interview is that she has become bored with the job and the challenge and excitement are gone. This is a critical principle of managing others: consistent superior performance over time is directly related to the employee receiving enough appropriate feedback to keep the bucket from draining dry.
So what could the manager do to make a substantial deposit of feedback in the clerk’s bucket? What if the manager said to her, “Mary, I really appreciate what you were able to get accomplished yesterday.” You worked really well and I especially like that you cleaned up the files. As a result, we had a great head start on the invoices. I know how hectic the afternoon shift can be but you have a knack of making things happen. I want you to know how happy I am with what you did. You are an important part of our team. Thanks.”
It’s difficult to say how often Mary might need a substantial deposit of feedback like this one, but it needs to be on a frequency that her bucket can’t drain dry. And it needs to be specifically focused on her performance that contributes to departmental excellence. The manager must be aware of Mary’s job performance and then take the time to give her appropriate feedback.
The feedback the manager gave Mary follows a specific formula. Notice that it wasn’t atta boy, or atta girl, or way to go, or nice going, or keep it up, or looking good. All of those comments are okay, and people can feel better after hearing them. But they lack the power we oftentimes need to get the reaction we want, Atta boys and atta girls are insignificant feedback, because they lack the power of real supportive feedback.
The formula to deliver supportive feedback in the most powerful way is
1. Describe the specific behavior.
2. Describe the positive consequences of the behavior.
3. Describe how you feel about the behavior.
4. Describe why you feel that way.
First, the manager described specifically what Mary did, in other words her behaviors. Next, he explained the positive consequences of those behaviors. Then he told her how he feels about what she did. And finally, he explained why he feels the way he does. Each of the four steps is designed to focus the supportive feedback in a way to maximize its effect. An atta boy is less effective than this formula because it is so non-specific and unfocused. The recipient of an atta boy may not be able to connect the feedback with his or her behavior. The reason this formula works so well is that it supports the specific behavior that you want repeated, and it does so in a very powerful way. It is in this way that the supportive feedback formula is similar to the method used by Sea World to reinforce behaviors with the animals.
There are two directions you can take when giving supportive feedback. You can reinforce who the person is, inside, or you can reinforce a behavior the person does that you would like repeated. While both of these reinforcements are good and appropriate, knowing when to use each type, and how much of it to do can be confusing. It can take some time and practice in reading people to be able to discern how much reinforcement of a behavior is needed as compared to reinforcing the good nature of that person. Perhaps the reason it can be confusing is that both of these reinforcements are necessary, most especially to your children. The challenge is when to use each type. Actually, the two techniques are related. So whether you reinforce the person, or the behavior, you haven’t wasted your time. Good timings frequently happen as a result of either type of supportive feedback.
Because of the pressure to make a profit, too many managers have forgotten the importance of helping employees reduce or eliminate ineffective behaviors. One of the most effective ways I know of eliminating ineffective behaviors from employees is to fill their feedback buckets with supportive feedback. When your supportive feedback fills someone’s bucket, and makes them feel good inside, there is a much better chance that that person will act effectively and cause fewer problems in the future, In other words, a little investment of your time today will likely bring fewer problems tomorrow.
Sometimes, with some people, supportive feedback doesn’t work, In spite of your best efforts, whether you use the power formula or not, some people won’t react positively to supportive feedback. What do you do then? Is there a formula for those situations? We’ll look at those issues in the future.
Tags: employee feedback, employee performance, employee performance appraisal, feedback
Posted in feedback | No Comments »
Wednesday, October 13th, 2010
People are like fingerprints, no two are alike. Because each person has unique histories, talents, abilities, and behavior traits, we receive, internalize, and react to feedback just as differently. Yet receiving and responding to feedback and coaching is critical if we are to grow, improve, and become better, more well rounded individuals.
 This past week I took my family on an extended weekend trip to the lake to get our last summer fun in before school gets underway for the kids and the weather begins to turn cold. As I was leaving my neighborhood in my truck (Bed full of cargo, and boat and trailer in tow), the individual driving a vehicle in front of me decided to make a turn into a supermarket parking lot. This immediately created a problem for me. Not only was the driver not in the turning lane/shoulder of the road, he didn’t put on his turn signal until the very last moment. This chain of events could have caused an accident if I hadn’t proactively hit my breaks and creep into the other lane in an attempt slow my truck and boat in order to avoid crashing into his car.
I was irritated by the situation and offered up some feedback to the driver. In my attempt to slow tons of my steel truck and fiber glass boat, I gave a couple of honks on the horn followed by a quick flick of my heads lights (meaning get out of the way and quick or I will crash into you). What really bothered me was the reaction this guy demonstrated to my warning. He pulled to an immediate stop, and offered some crude hand gestures through his window and proceeded to drive slowly. It was clear he wanted to turn this issue into heated verbal or physical argument by his behavior. I told to my wife “that guy is a jackass.” Not from his driving abilities, but from the way he responded to my feedback. My feedback was not intended to show rage. I did not lay on my horn and start yelling. I gave a couple of honks and a flicker of my headlights telling this guy that his current behavior was going to cause an accident. That’s why cars have horns.
His reaction caused me to evaluate my perceptions of both giving and receiving feedback. I thought about how I would have reacted if I had been honked at. My conclusion is that we all need to be more open to feedback and coaching and not take personal offense to it. In order to grow, and develop we learn from others. If we are to enhance our abilities and expertise, we need to receive feedback, either supportive or corrective.
Supportive Feedback
This is all about reinforcing the positive. When you see someone doing something great and want the behavior to continue, or simply recognizing someone for their work. It is geared to continually improving performance.
Corrective Feedback
This is about changing behavior, performance, and results. It occurs when an improvement or change in needed. It is important to understand that corrective feedback is not negative or abusive in its style, it is only intended to correct the behavior at hand.
While it is important for us who both give and receive feedback to understand these two types, we can hit higher levels of performance if we are a little more open, a little less sensitive (on the receiving end), and ensure our point of view is clearly communicated. Let’s recommit ourselves to the concept of feedback.
Tags: corrective feedback, effective communication, feedback, impatient communication, misinterpreted communication, poor communication
Posted in character, coaching skills, communication, feedback | No Comments »
Wednesday, April 1st, 2009
Not too long ago, a global insurance company surveyed thousands of its employees through an Employee Satisfaction Questionnaire, seeking feedback to improve what the senior executives identified as a “morale problem.” The results of the survey were enlightening, particularly the response to Question #6: What can your manager do to make this a better place to work? More than 89% of the employees answered, “Recognize me for a job well done.”
 One of the most basic findings in psychology is that rewarding a specific behavior increases the likelihood of the behavior being repeated. Praise serves as an important reward and motivation for good work.
Praise strengthens the relationships a manager has with his or her direct reports. People want to know their manager cares about them enough to pay attention to what they are doing. They also want to know their contributions are genuinely appreciated.
Employees who frequently receive appropriate praise for positive contributions are often more receptive to corrective feedback. The best managers know that balancing appropriate praise and corrective feedback are critical to helping employees stay on track. When managers show they have their employees’ best interests at heart, employees are naturally more open to hearing how they can improve.
Dr. Gerald Graham, the RP Clinton Distinguished Professor of Management at Wichita State University, surveyed 1,500 employees from a wide variety of organizations and industries and reported the following participant responses:
- 58% seldom if ever received praise from their manager
- 76% seldom if ever received written thanks from their manager
- 78% seldom if ever got a promotion based on performance
- 81% seldom if ever received public praise
- 92% seldom if ever participated in a meeting designed to build morale
This same study invited participants to rank, in order, 65 potential motivators – the top five are those listed above!
Most leaders agree that praise is important, that it leads to better morale, higher productivity, and builds a stronger relationship with employees. So if praise is so powerful, why don’t managers praise more often?
- Despite good intentions, many managers have so much to accomplish that praise falls to the bottom of their to-do list
- Managers focus on eliminating barriers to needed results and, therefore, focus solely on employees’ failure to meet standards
- The tone of the management team is set from above – many managers report they never receive praise from their manager
- They have not developed the habit of letting people know how much they are appreciated
Guidelines for Delivering Effective Praise
The following guidelines can help managers become more effective in offering genuine, appropriate praise:
1. Be genuinely appreciative. Every person on your team is doing part of your job for you. While it is important to recognize the true home runs of performance, don’t forget those who plug along solidly every day are committed to doing a good job.
2. Deliver praise from your heart. Your appreciation of their efforts must be evident in your facial expression, your tone of voice, and how you phrase your praise. You want your employees to know that the job they perform well is important to you, to your team, to your department, your organization.
3. Deliver praise as soon as possible. Don’t wait until the quarterly (or annual!) formal performance management discussion to mention something an employee did months ago. By continually observing performance, you can offer timely expressions of acknowledgement and appreciation. Genuine praise helps people feel good about themselves and even more committed to doing a good job.
4. Make praise specific by describing the exact behavior or skill along with your expression of appreciation. “Nice work, Jim” is much less motivating than describing specific examples of what was done. Specific praise assures employees that you are truly paying close attention to what they do and how they do it.
5. Praise people publicly. Acknowledging people in public accomplishes two important things. The employees feel even better as they are recognized in front of their peers. In addition, public praise is one way of reminding other employees of what you want from them.
Praise is an effective tool to increase employee engagement and promote a positive work environment. It can take only seconds to deliver, yet the impact of consistent genuine, appropriate praise can be immediate and long-term.
Tags: communication skills for managers, creating a positive work environment, employee praise, how to create a positive work environment, how to praise an employee, how to praise employees, praise employees, praising an employee, praising employees, words of praise for employees
Posted in character, feedback, praise, relationships | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, November 26th, 2008
At CMOE, coaching is a big topic. Essentially, our team eats and breathes coaching. The Coaching Skills workshop is our flagship product, and our book, The Coach is one of our best sellers. The skills, tools, and concepts are engrained in our work culture and personal lives because of the benefits and results it offers.I had guessed that all of this exposure to effective coaching was what made me so surprised and disturbed when I saw an example of very ineffective coaching while watching the Olympic Games this summer, but now it seems I wasn’t the only one bothered by this particular example. When the American women’s pole vaulter, Jenn Stuczynski, won the silver medal, her coach, Rick Suhr, responded with criticism, indifference, and no support. If you haven’t seen the clip, click on this link: Stuczynski Hears Harsh Words From Coach. – (you’ll be forced to watch a short ad).
 Timing
Although I would promote the use of coaching all of the time, when a team member or employee is facing obstacles, disappointment, or lack of motivation, coaching is especially important. For this Olympic athlete, coaching is strongly needed and it is not the time to point out faults and criticize, as you see in the clip. In such opportunities, the coach should highlight successes, encourage, motivate, and show support. While feedback is necessary when coaching for high performance, feedback must be presented in an effective way.
Feedback
In the video clip from the Olympic Games, you will hear Mr. Surh point out observations. Feedback can be a tricky feat in itself, much less when given under pressures that exist for a coach and team member who are competing in the Olympic Games. Without much thought or care, feedback can result in misunderstandings, discord, and insecurity. Without strong, clear feedback, people are unable to know fully what is expected of them, what they are doing well, or what they can do to improve. Strong, clear feedback, will help others develop, encourage responsibility, loyalty, and trust.
Celebrate
There are definite moments when coaching is needed, appropriate opportunities for feedback, and then there are times to celebrate successes. Without doubt, this was one of the times for celebration and Rick Suhr really missed the boat on doing so with Jenn Stucznski. Sure, both the athlete and her coach may have felt disappointed they didn’t reach their ultimate goal of a Gold Medal. However, coaches must take the time to celebrate their hard work, determination, the journey, and any successes. Jenn Stuczynski definitely had reason to celebrate. Despite this being her fourth year of pole vaulting and her first time competing in the Olympic Games, she won a silver medal. Without celebrations, both coaches and team members begin to lose motivation and purpose, negatively affecting their performance.
I sometimes wonder what might have happened if Mr. Suhr used more effective coaching skills that day by holding his feedback for a more appropriate time and celebrating the success he and Stuczynski were experiencing. Would Jenn Stuczynski have felt even more motivated to reach her goal? Would she have come away from coaching sessions with valuable feedback and ready to improve and progress? What might have resulted if Rick Suhr had encouraged her and celebrated more after each Olympic trial. Maybe she would have won the Gold Medal, and maybe not.
While Rick Suhr’s coaching record shows he is doing something right with his athletes, I imagine that if he had better interpersonal coaching skills he would see even greater success and improved performance with the athletes. It is also likely that there wouldn’t be a video clip of him at the Olympic Games circling the internet!
Tags: coaching feedback, coaching skills workshop, coaching skills workshops
Posted in character, coaching skills, communication, feedback, relationships | No Comments »
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